I'm laying here in bed EXTREMELY frustrated as I am desperately lacking in sleep and B, our 10 year old with Autism has woken up and refusing to sleep. I've been complaining to myself concentrating on how this will "stress me out" and then I smacked myself; we have come so far.
Over the passed several years nighttime became an anxiety stricken sport. "Super Mom" rarely ever slept a decent night sleep and I, Captain Ally, was always bracing myself for what adventures would be in store.
I'll never forget the very first time I took care of B & C (our autistic kids) overnight; I wrapped at least six rubber bands around the French doors that separated the rooms from the rest of the house and laid in bed for hours over analyzing every creek I heard.
I finally fell asleep around 4am only to wake at 5 to the lights in the hall, "oh no!" I thought, running to the hall and finding C butt naked pulling something out of the linen closet. She was covered in what looked and smelled of vomit. "Are you ok.."I began to say when I realized the doors were open! Into the kitchen she had gone.
Every light was on, an entire package of gluten-free hot dog buns had been meticulously sliced into 1/6's and individually placed in dixie cups and coconut ice cream was melting and overflowing in the middle of the table, surrounded by several rice, ice cream cones. The microwave door was ajar and from it spewed pasta with red sauce EVERYWHERE; the further down I looked, the worse it got. And then there was the Shiraz. A beautiful bottle of red wine had tipped over, mixing with the red sauce and strewn across the white cabinetry and tiling, lacking any delicateness at all.
So here I am in the present day complaining to myself that our B is sitting on his knees next to his bed, putting together a puzzle. Here is a moment to really cherish. Not the moment I was lacking in sleep, but rather the moment where I could truly appreciate that, even though I am so caught up in how it bothers me, he is miraculously acting just the way he should; like a 10 year old boy.
Over the passed several years nighttime became an anxiety stricken sport. "Super Mom" rarely ever slept a decent night sleep and I, Captain Ally, was always bracing myself for what adventures would be in store.
I'll never forget the very first time I took care of B & C (our autistic kids) overnight; I wrapped at least six rubber bands around the French doors that separated the rooms from the rest of the house and laid in bed for hours over analyzing every creek I heard.
I finally fell asleep around 4am only to wake at 5 to the lights in the hall, "oh no!" I thought, running to the hall and finding C butt naked pulling something out of the linen closet. She was covered in what looked and smelled of vomit. "Are you ok.."I began to say when I realized the doors were open! Into the kitchen she had gone.
Every light was on, an entire package of gluten-free hot dog buns had been meticulously sliced into 1/6's and individually placed in dixie cups and coconut ice cream was melting and overflowing in the middle of the table, surrounded by several rice, ice cream cones. The microwave door was ajar and from it spewed pasta with red sauce EVERYWHERE; the further down I looked, the worse it got. And then there was the Shiraz. A beautiful bottle of red wine had tipped over, mixing with the red sauce and strewn across the white cabinetry and tiling, lacking any delicateness at all.
So here I am in the present day complaining to myself that our B is sitting on his knees next to his bed, putting together a puzzle. Here is a moment to really cherish. Not the moment I was lacking in sleep, but rather the moment where I could truly appreciate that, even though I am so caught up in how it bothers me, he is miraculously acting just the way he should; like a 10 year old boy.
No comments:
Post a Comment